We Know the COVID-19 Vaccine Is Safe Because It’s Called a Vaccine

2019: Vaccines are safe because they’re so thoroughly tested for short-term and long-term side effects alike. So if you’re declining an approved and tried-and-true jab you’re just being irrational and superstitious.

2020: Here is the first-ever vaccine of its kind (mRNA) that is essentially untested and was rolled out in all of 6 months with no chance to study long-term side effects whatsoever, but it’s safe because it’s called a vaccine and other vaccines that are approved after extensive long-term trials that this vaccine did nor receive are safe.

Call me crazy but it would seem the argument changed a little bit here?

What if a person wanted to remain a pro-vaxxer of the 2019 variety?

What if someone took the position of “shoot me up with as many vaccines as possible AFTER they have gone through rigorous and extensive trials including long-term ones and passed them”?

That would now be deemed selfish, dangerous, irresponsible, unjustifiable, silly, dumb buffoonish, stupid, and against your health interest.

What was an orthodoxy when this year started is now heretical.

We’re living in an Orwellian reality where what is almost universally held true one moment, can become a thought-crime of the highest order in the next one.

Forget about common sense. Forget about being allowed to keep an awareness of proportion, context, and second-order consequences. We are not even allowed to keep to the orthodoxies of 2019.

Everything must fall to the Covid Rouge and its Year Zero reset.

So remember citizen. The Covid-19 vaccine is safe because it’s called a vaccine and other vaccines that are approved after the kind of trials this vaccine did not receive are safe. Very simple to understand.

Besides, it’s a vaccine for an extremely deadly plague with a 99.98% survival rate for the under 60 that you definitely don’t want to take your chances with.

Much better to bet on the extremely low likelihood of human folly, and place yourself in the tender care of fanatics. That has a much better track record.

After all, humans unintentionally sacrificing other humans to their fanaticism, ideology, messianic complexes, panic, cowardice, and pride — that almost never happens.

Well, maybe it could happen. But surely the chance is much smaller than 0.02%. Surely. Because if the chance that the money-hungry Big Pharma, clueless politicians, and the Messianic COVID Rouge overlooked something is much greater than 0.02% then it would make sense for the majority to take their chances with nature’s coronavirus instead. But that’s not the case, surely. If the likes of Boris Johnson say it’s safe that’s good enough for me. I don’t even need a long-term trial. And it seems neither do they.

Funny how that works though. Up until now you were supposed to — if at all possible — not even leave your room. Risk aversion was everything. Is the world going to hell in a handbasket? Yes, but that’s the price we’re willing to pay in order to spare you from having to take an unknown risk. In fact, we believe so strongly in you not taking a risk that we’re willing to strip you of rights to prevent you from being able to do it yourself.

But now that there’s an experimental vaccine based on completely novel technology? Well now go right ahead and inject yourself with that! Take a ride on the wild side! To do less would be to deny science. And in fact, we may take away your rights if you don’t.

Sometimes we keep you from risk, sometimes we push you into risk. But what is a constant is that your rights are always the collateral damage. You know. By accident. Because we know what’s best for you, for us.

And what’s best for you for us, is that your rights be held by us in escrow. Really in the long view, you will come to see this whole Covid business as a blessing as it will have more firmly placed you in the hands of your betters. Things will be so much better from now on. Particularly for us. And for you. Once you develop a taste for weather-sustainable cockroach milk.