Soldier Excited to Take Over Father’s Old Afghanistan Patrol Route

FAYETTEVILLE, NC — Saying he “never could have imagined” he would have the opportunity to follow directly in his father’s footsteps, 19-year-old U.S. Army Pvt. Tyler Corcoran was reportedly excited Tuesday to take over his dad’s old patrol route in Afghanistan.

“It’s just so incredible that I’ll soon be walking the very same footpath as my old man, securing the perimeter of Camp Chapman in Khost Province just like he did so many years ago,” said Corcoran, who explained how, throughout his childhood, he had heard his father’s stories of guarding the forward operating base but never once considered that he would one day be traversing along the exact walls and securing the identical checkpoints his father had during his tours of duty.

“To think that I’ll be monitoring the road between the airstrip and detention facility that Dad always talked about, keeping an eye out for IEDs and any suspicious activity the same way he did all those years ago. Honestly, it’s hard to believe—but, wow, it’s really happening.”

At press time, a tear fell from Corcoran’s eye as he hugged his dad goodbye in the very same manner he remembered his father doing to him when he was a toddler.

Source: The Onion

Text may contain traces of satire.

11 Comments
  1. Garry Compton says

    When my boys were born in the mid 70s, my wife made me promise her, that I would try as hard as possible – not to send her sons to a Vietnam, like her husband and sooo many of his friends – had gone to. It’s one promise I kept to . Thank You Darlene.

  2. Samuel Sam says

    His mother probably hugged and flirted with his friends.

  3. cap960 says

    Fool!

  4. Pablo says

    The book to read on the Israel Lobby–a place to start–is “The Israel Lobby and US Foreign Policy” by John Mersheimer and Stephen M. Walt. You won’t hear about this subject in the American MSM.

  5. cechas vodobenikov says

    more satire? or backward stupidity?

    1. Jihadi Colin says

      Not really satire at all. I knew a female on Orkut whose boyfriend was an invader of Iraq but who was allegedly anti military. The last time I saw her, on Fakebook circa 2015, her son was an invader of Afghanistan.

    2. itchyvet says

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  6. Hind Abyad says

    The worst ignorance.

  7. Gaute Lote says

    “Text may contain traces of satire.”

    Indeed, all of theonion.com is satire, but in this day and age the Onion is virtually indistinguishable from the main stream media…
    Sad but true!

  8. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

    It appears that he is just as ignorant of the Constitution as his father is, as well.

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