Maj. Tulsi Gabbard Receives Surprise Deployment Orders to Antarctica

"The Democratic presidential candidate has been a unique critical voice against American military imperialism"

Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard (D-HI) was surprised with deployment orders to Antarctica earlier today, her presidential campaign confirmed.

The Democratic presidential candidate has been a unique critical voice against American military imperialism, drawing national attention to the issue during the first two rounds of Democratic primary debates, much to the chagrin of foreign policy hawks on both sides of the political aisle.

Congresswoman Gabbard is a major in the Hawaii National Guard, serving as a military police officer. She will be deployed to the Amundsen-Scott South Pole Station as part of a mission to enhance the security posture at the research station.

Sources at the Pentagon expressed concern at the potential threat posed by a nearby Russian research station located 800 miles away, as well as an increasingly hostile local penguin population.

“The situation in Antarctica is the greatest geopolitical threat we’ve faced since Grenada in the early 1980s,” said National Security Advisor John Bolton. “It’s imperative we put boots on the ground to protect America’s vital interests in the region.”

Gabbard recently made headlines following her brutal indictment of Sen. Kamala Harris’s (D-CA) record as California’s attorney general in the most recent round of Democratic debates. She was the most searched presidential candidate on Google following the debate, and drew ire from the Harris camp. Harris is rumored to be the favorite among the Democratic establishment and has courted big donorswho funded the Clinton campaign in 2016.

Gabbard will be deploying to Antarctica within the week, and is expected to return next summer, shortly after the Democratic National Convention has concluded.

“It’s unfortunate that Congresswoman Gabbard’s presidential aspirations have been thwarted by her upcoming deployment,” said Sen. Kamala Harris. “It will be difficult for her to have much of a voice in this election cycle while stationed at the South Pole.”

“If only she had some friends at the Pentagon who could do her a favor,” she added, winking dramatically and making finger guns long after the cameras stopped taking pictures.

Source: Duffel Blog

13 Comments
  1. Sean Hart says

    Latest News Flash : Tulsi Gabbard dies in Plane Crash Sometime in the future .

  2. Lucy Lalrintluangi Hauzel says

    It is sad to hear that she has to leave far flung at this time..wish she deploy little more closer..!

  3. Jman says

    -zzzzzzzzz

  4. subhuti 2 says

    Don’t laugh too fast. One of JFK’s key allies was sent to New Zealand just before he was killed. JFK’s “murderer’s name” was already reported as the suspect—-before JFK was shot!

    It would not be at all surprising for Gabbard to be deep sized in one way or another. The list of peace candidates whose career was sabotaged or worse is long.

  5. DarkEyes says

    I heard recently that the Pinquin Community on Antarctica is getting more and more excited now they got the good news Tulsi is coming.

    To send Major Gabbard was, according to the Spokesperson of the Head of the Pinquin Community, the best choice made ever by the US best and most intelligent Israel Firster Bolton (that is how the Pinquin Community call Mr Bolton on Antarctica).

  6. thomas malthaus says

    “The situation in Antarctica is the greatest geopolitical threat we’ve faced since Grenada in the early 1980s,” said National Security Advisor John Bolton. “It’s imperative we put boots on the ground to protect America’s vital interests in the region.”

    Fresh water and penguins until or if US oil majors strike the big one.

  7. yan neuhoff says

    Good joke. But how much you wanna bet Harrrrizzzz read this and thought: This needs to happen now!!!

  8. Garry Compton says

    Good joke — definitely needed a time out and a laugh. Bravo.

  9. Jonathan says

    I thought this was a satire piece when I first read the article heading. This is a blatant move to remove Gabbard from from the race! The U.S. Is not only not hiding its duplicity and arrogance. She is rubbing it in our faces. The arrest, imprisonment, and torture of Assange, Epstein’s “suicide”, and the spiriting away of Gabbard to Antarctica. The totalitarian machine wants you to know who is in charge. There is no attempt to conceal how utterly morally bankrupt and anti-freedom we have become.

    1. thomas malthaus says

      Fox News is reporting that’s she’s headed to Indonesia for two weeks.

      https://www.foxnews.com/politics/tulsi-gabbard-deployment-indonesia

      1. Jonathan says

        Interesting. I’ll definitely be following this story to its ultimate conclusion.

        1. Canosin says

          oh yeah….. and than you may hide again beneath the next stone waiting for the next “outrageous” storyline

      2. Jonathan says

        Ahhh. I just finished the Checkpoint Asia story. If you read to the end, it becomes obvious it’s only satire.

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