Lindsey Graham Volunteers to Remain Behind in Afghanistan and Fight Taliban If Troops Withdraw

"Sources close to Graham say he has already made preparations to deploy, such as purchasing a 2007 Toyota Hilux"

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) released a video statement on YouTube today in which he assured voters he would stay in Afghanistan and fight the Taliban after the last U.S. forces withdraw from the country.

In the video, Graham is seen wearing a “Grunt Style” t-shirt and sitting in a pickup truck, ranting for several hours about everything from long waiting room times at the VA to why Captain Marvel would have never made it through Ranger school unless they lowered the standards.

At one point, Graham says, “If the president orders the troops out of Afghanistan, I will deploy and fight the Taliban until they’re all dead or they surrender unconditionally.”

“This isn’t a nation of quitters,” Graham yelled hoarsely into the camera. “We’ve only been there for a couple decades. I lived dedication and commitment as a battle-tested leader during the weeks I spent in Iraq and Afghanistan. And let me tell you this, the men and women of the great state of South Carolina, from the F-16 factory in Greenville to the MRE plant in Mullins, are prepared to support the troops in Afghanistan for as long as necessary.”

In addition to serving as a senator, Graham is retired colonel and Bronze Star recipient. He left the Air Force Reserve after more than 30 years. Graham’s statement refers to the nearly five months he spent deployed as a Judge Advocate General, widely regarded as the service’s “Delta Force.”

Graham’s video announcement follows his warning to President Trump last week that completely withdrawing U.S. troops from Afghanistan could lead to the country becoming a safe-haven for terrorist groups “as bad as Pakistan, Syria, or parts of the United States.”

While defense industry proponents agree that leaving a small contingent of several hundred thousand troops could prevent another 9/11-style attack on American soil, critics like Democratic presidential hopeful and fellow combat veteran Pete Buttigieg argue that the 18 years spent in Afghanistan have yielded little security gains and that troops should be withdrawn immediately.

“During my time in Afghanistan, I didn’t know if I would ever make it home,” Buttigieg told reporters. “All the Air Force transport aircraft kept ‘breaking down’ in Rota [Spain] and I had to wait for days at a Green Bean near the passenger terminal drinking lattes made with shelf-stable milk. It was horrible.”

“But my seven months there as a Naval Reserve intelligence officer gave me the foreign policy experience to say confidently that we need to withdraw troops completely and immediately, no matter the second and third-order effects I haven’t considered.”

Sources close to Graham say he has already made preparations to deploy, such as purchasing a 2007 Toyota Hilux, stocking up on logs of Copenhagen and Rip It energy drinks, and downloading several terabytes of porn to an external hard drive.

Graham’s video ends with him shooting in three-gun competitions, flipping tractor tires on a farm, and firing an M240L from the hip while wearing American flag silkies.

Source: Duffel Blog

  1. thomas malthaus says

    An opinion re the Taliban from someone who covered Afghanistan during the post-Soviet occupation.

    His opinion on Osama bin Laden re 9/11.

  2. thomas malthaus says

    The US and the Afghan government are responsible for more civilian deaths than ISIS and Taliban combined. Since ISIS is a US proxy. . . .

  3. Mary E says

    And this affects us how??? Get those troops out and leave Afghanistan to its own devices…just get out of those poppy fields, CIA and start doing the business you were ‘invented’ to do: keep America safe, not go into sovereign states and disrupt and sever governments…and certainly not to grow poppies to make that stuff you make $Billions on.

  4. Séamus Ó Néill says

    Is there anyone in the US government that’s not touched with a bit of insanity ? But Mr Graham need not worry, the US troops are not withdrawing from Afghanistan anytime soon. The CIA’s lucrative opium trade brings in billions of dollars each year….. incidentally, a trade that the Taliban had almost eliminated until America’s return. Next door, in Iraq, the US embassy is the world’s biggest, a sprawling 104 acres, and this serves as a worldwide distribution centre for this opium….it also the distribution centre for weaponry, armaments and wages for all America’s ISIS proxies in the ME, especially in Syria.

  5. JustPassingThrough says

    send that fruit-cake in there with some of his toy-boys.
    the taliban will laugh themselves to death.
    and he can claim victory.

  6. John C Carleton says

    Need to reinstate Common Law Courts in America.

    That Pedoist really really needs to answer to the American people for his crimes.

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