Iran War Would Be Only One Letter Different From Iraq War

The Raytheon Institute, a bipartisan think tank that specializes in starting Middle Eastern wars, has released a report that estimates the imminent Iran War will be approximately one letter different from the ongoing Iraq War.

“We based our analysis primarily on the words themselves,” explained Richard Cheney, the institute’s Bonelli Fellow. “If you look closely, you’ll see that both countries’ names start ‘IRA,’ but ‘IRAN’ ends with an ‘N’ while ‘IRAQ’ ends with a ‘Q.’”

The report spelled out further similarities, including America’s total lack of justification for initiating hostilities, a draft dodging Republican president who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, spinelessness on the left during the buildup despite virtue signaling of being antiwar, simmering sectarian tensions in the country to be invaded, the prospective enemy’s large standing military that won’t be able to face down America’s initial assault but could become deadly in a drawn out guerilla campaign, a complete lack of support from the rest of the world, large amounts of oil at stake, media reports that have inflamed overwrought concerns about weapons of mass destruction, and relief from service members in Kuwait that they finally have something to do.

For 99 percent of Americans the two wars will be identical. Beyond an afternoon wasted at the recruiting station almost enlisting, the authors note, they won’t be affected at all.

Source: Duffel Blog

Text may contain traces of satire.

10 Comments
  1. Séamus Ó Néill says

    America had two main reasons for fecking up the ME. “The greater Israel project” and oil ! …..both of which have gone badly wrong. An attack on Iran would mean that the Jews/Zionists would get hit from several fronts with highly sophisticated and deadly accurate missiles. The Israeli’s, only used to sniping at children and defenceless old women and attacking Syria from behind the cover of civilian aircraft would be devastated in days. American bases are also within the range of these missiles and their largest base and command post is in Iranian friendly Qatar. Their other reason oil…..Iran can and would instantly cut the oil supply to 3/4 of the world, crippling the world economy and immediately triggering a world-wide recession. Add to this the very real possibility of Iranian sleepers in the US becoming activated and bringing the war to America’s doorstep…..something America or its complacent civilians have never experienced before and you have a total nightmare for the psychopathic warmongers in Yankee land !

  2. Jesus says

    The difference being US uses the same weaponry and technology of two decades ago, while Iran has slowly modernized their Air Force and drone capability along with EW capabilities and an awesome ballistic missile inventory.
    I hoped Iranian drew some blood instead of being rather timid.

  3. Mary E says

    There would be huge differences if the US attempts to go to war with Iran: it would lose big time in so many ways. Militarily for one. ..World reaction would be totally negative with – you would think – no other country joining with the US in their suicide mission.
    Lest Washington forgets: Russia has made it clear that it is behind Iran 100%…so there you go…most likely a cowering US wouldn’t attempt such an ignorant idea without dire conequences. AND= Iraq and Syria – possibly China – would be in on it too…all against the US. Hegemony is on its last leg.

  4. Charles Homer says

    Here is an interesting article that explains how governments have changed the rules so that they can justify killing anyone who they believe may at some point in time have the potential to be involved in a terrorist plot:

    https://viableopposition.blogspot.com/2020/01/the-bethlehem-doctrine-and-new.html

    This rather Orwellian move gives governments the justification that they to kill any of us just because they feel that we might pose a threat and that is a very, very scary prospect. It is very reminiscent of the movie Minority Report where crimes of the future are punished in the present.

  5. JustPassingThrough says

    “For 99 percent of Americans the two wars will be identical. Beyond an afternoon wasted at the recruiting station enlisting, the authors note, they won’t be affected at all.”

    Totally braindead from drugs, s*hitty food and water, megadoses of their “culture”, and porn. Life in the fast lane. lmao

    1. Canosin says

      😉 ….. perfect

  6. getreal155 says

    I’m nearly hoping the US starts a real war. They will get spanked like never before. And not only by Iran

    1. Mychal Arnold says

      Unfortunately, they know they can not start a war. The times are a changin’! The ussa can be reached and they can now only do what there doing. Putin saw through the states feigned friendship. Once he realized their true evil he quickly pulled back and now does his own thing mostly with their friend, China. Any war they start will not included their troops of any mass proportions and will be against a very weak opponent like a snake! They can only wage this type of war now they will see bomb after bomb come whistling out of the sky striking at will and there is nothing they can do and they know it! I do not wish to see this but if they continue with a steering malign force in the background then they will suffer!

      1. Rilme Hakonen says

        Anyone can not start a war; I did it myself last week. The point is that the US cannot start and win a war against Iran. The US doesn’t have that capability.

    2. Canosin says

      the United Zionist States of Terrorism don’t care for the losses of civilians that will be huge on the iranian side…as long as it happens only there….
      this would change drastically as soon as it would hit american soil….

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