FDA Agrees to Use Children in Experiments Instead of Dogs


WASHINGTON, DC—Following outrage about Dr. Anthony Fauci’s use of beagles in horrible experiments, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has agreed to use children 5-11 in deadly experiments instead of beagles.

“We agree that it is horrible to subject those poor dogs to the type of experiments that Fauci was conducting. So, we’re going to use human children in our experiments,” FDA advisor Chet Forbranse said.

The move was based on Pfizer’s request to experiment their COVID vaccine on children aged 5-11.

“This is really smart,” Forbranse said. “We need to release the drug to the masses or else we’re never going to see how harmful it really is.”

CNN is reporting that the new experiments will be mostly peaceful.

The vote is a crucial step towards experimenting on younger children, but not the final word. If the FDA decides to formally authorize the experiments, the Centers for Disease Control and Promotion (CDC) must also weigh in with its own recommendations on how and when children should be used in experiments.

Source: Genesius Times

Text may contain traces of satire.

  1. Chuck says

    I didn’t see any satire. It sounds like the FDA announcement.

    1. ken says

      Hi Chuck

      I think they’re trying to point out how outraged Americans were to hear the puppies were being tortured and used as lab rats.

      Yet Americans are chomping at the bit using their children as lab rats knowing all the adverse events so far.

    2. Ilya G Poimandres says

      Hence 🤡 world!

  2. ken says

    Americans love their children,,,, sure they do. That’s why they make the poor bastards wear face diapers all day at skool. Now they’re fighting each other to be the first on their block to have their kid injected with this poison.

    Kids are being arrested in detention centers aka skools for refusing to mask up. A 16 year old honors student in a Wyoming torture chamber. It turns my stomach to watch the medical nazis do this to children.

    Going on 18,000 Americans dead so far from that safe and effective shot.

  3. Malatok says

    Their covaid$ death squirt caper has been an intelligence test from day one. Evolution is a very messy business and most critters that are spawned never make it through the swamp. Life doesn’t give a rat’s ass who lives it or indeed about the critter that throws it away because it wasn’t evolved enough to know instinctively that gubermint, pedovore eugenicist reptiles like Kill Bill gates of hell, Pharma NAZIS and ilk all want you dead.

    YOU are the disease, their covaid$ death squirt the cure. Rocket science is different.

    One mistake and you’re out. Believe nothing from above; EVER!
    Your kakistocracy only wants what’s best for
    you…..nudge..nudge…wink…sputter…. cackle…..$quirt!
    Professor Mattias Desmet on EweTueb “How can so many still buy into the narrative”

Leave A Reply

Your email address will not be published.