Dozens Shocked by the Upcoming Suicide of Ghislaine Maxwell
Will be so shocking
Dozens of people scattered throughout the world were shocked to hear of the upcoming suicide of Jeffrey Epstein madame Ghislaine Maxwell who was arrested Thursday on a six-count indictment charging her with grooming young girls for sex.
“I was utterly shocked to hear of the suicide. It was almost like you couldn’t see it coming AT ALL,” Barnie Flufflepants of Hoboken, NJ said. “Almost.”
The British socialite, 58, was arrested by the FBI in New Hampshire around 8:30 a.m., sources told Genesius Times. She was scheduled to be suicided in late July.
The just-unsealed indictment charges stem from Maxwell’s role “in the sexual exploitation and abuse of multiple minor girls by Jeffrey Epstein” as early as 1994, court papers say.
Epstein was suicided in 2019 after being held in suicide watch to prevent the prisoner from killing himself. He managed to “hang himself” with toilet paper and avoided testifying against the world’s most powerful pedophiles and child sex traffickers.
“I was just flabbergasted to discover that someone who was threatening to uncover a global elite pedophile ring was killed in two weeks. Just flabbergasted,” Tommie Highhat of Oakland, CA said before turning CNN on.
Source: Genesius Times
The Onion could not have written anything this “good”! “Forthcoming suicide! News at 11!