Donald Trump Is the Greatest American President Ever — At Undermining the Empire With His Failures

This most American president is unintentionally also the best one

“The most successful presidents are men who have done the most catastrophic damage at home and abroad and have completely gotten away with it with their reputations and the reputation of the evil empire they rep perfectly in tact”

Donald Trump is the worst president in American History! That seems to be the downright unanimous opinion of every left wing wonk from here to Noam Chomsky, and I might have a bit more respect for the view if these throngs of progressive intellectuals weren’t so goddamn smug about it. After all I’ve never been particularly tame in my criticisms of the son of a bitch myself. His penchant for pure evil is pretty well documented. Any human being who fucks with children the way he has at the borders deserves things I can’t publicly advocate without being shipped off to Gitmo. As if that weren’t enough, his role in the ongoing genocide in Yemen, the ethnic cleansing in the West Bank, and the downright apocalyptic baiting of Iran and China should make it crystal clear to anyone with half a working soul that Donald Trump is a world class bastard in the first degree. But the worst president in American history? I don’t know, the Donald has some pretty stiff competition there.

First of all, we have to seriously ask ourselves what makes an American president the worst? Are we talking about intent or results? If worst is simply another word for failure than Trump leads the pack by a mile. But what does it really mean to fail when the job is essentially running the most violently despotic empire in human history?

It’s a bit like asking who’s the worst Mafia don in Little Italy. If morality has anything to say about it then I would make the argument that the worst is the best.

The most successful presidents are men who have done the most catastrophic damage at home and abroad and have completely gotten away with it with their reputations and the reputation of the evil empire they rep perfectly in tact. If this is the test, Donald flunks with flying colors.

The man has been an absolute human tire fire, making an ass of himself on a daily basis and dragging the totally undeserved good name of the nation for which he stands down with him. Good.

The world has lost respect for America on the world stage? Fucking great!

They never should have respected this prolapsing anus of a genocide factory to begin with. In fact, allow me to be the first commie faggot to say, thank you Donald Trump, for setting the record straight, you psychotic race-bating imbecile. I really don’t know what else to say. Karma couldn’t do a better job.

Then who is the worst president in American history, you ask? It’s kind of a trivial question, but I’m a petty bitch with way too much goddamn time on my hands thanks to Trump facilitated COVID hysteria, so fuck it, I’ll go there. Why not? But you’re probably not gonna like what you asked for.

In my book, the title for worst, at least in modern history, goes to a three-way tie between the widely celebrated progressive presidencies of Woodrow Wilson, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Harry Truman, for the very simple fact that no other three presidents did more to establish America as a successfully violent modern-day Rome abroad and a carefully centralized executive dictatorship at home.

That was the real point of both World Wars and all the millions of bodies they claimed. It didn’t have a goddamn thing to do with mom, apple pie, or fighting them over there so we didn’t have to fight them over here. It was about preparing our plucky little ex-slave colony to take the place of the British on the world stage and the results extend well beyond the blast radius of Hiroshima. They include Korea, Vietnam, and Iraq.

I would also argue that a close second place tie actually goes to Trump’s three slovenly vaunted predecessors, Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and yes, the left’s beloved Barack Obama.

These are the administrations, more than any others, who have gone to the most hysterically despotic and hyper-violent lengths to preserve Wilson, Roosevelt, and Truman’s blood speckled American Century well after it has become abundantly clear that the party is over and keeping it going means a global Jonestown scenario.

There is no resuscitating an empire in the throws of stage four decline. Any attempt to do so is beyond suicidal, it’s downright genocidal. Another word for this self-destructive form of geostrategic denial is fascism.

With America’s pristine veneer of liberal democracy in a heap, Clinton, Bush, and Obama spent three successive administrations in total harmony creating a high tech dystopian global police state complete with shadow courts, armed drones, supermax prisons, and Patriot Acts galore. Every evil deed the Donald has actually shown a modicum of success with achieving was a gift from one or more of these three giants among bastards. Clinton turned the feds into an army, Bush invaded the Middle East, and Obama, the great progressive hope the left still seems to be so hopelessly in love with, built those fucking camps where Trump shipped the migrant children, began America’s sponsorship for that damn genocide in Yemen, and provided that syphilitic orange man-child with a fleet of manhunting armed drones to stalk black lives with. These are great presidents, and that’s precisely why they are the worst.

Lets face it children, the last three bastards made this orange bastard possible, and what has every leftist’s least favorite president done with this bounty of lethal gifts? He’s fucked it up. He’s fucked everything up. He’s failed to start a single war and he’s tied most of the existing ones into knots with his completely incoherent foreign policy. He’s reeked havoc at home, but it’s not like he’s even come close to getting away with it. Obama deported more Mexicans than Trump probably ever will and he won a fucking Nobel Peace Prize. Rolling Stone has given the psychopath his own nostalgia drenched collectors issue like Paul damn McCartney. Meanwhile, Donald Trump has made the American Empire a laughing stock with his buffoonery and this is the guy who makes Noam Chomsky and Medea Benjamin desperate enough to endorse a century-old white supremacist to defeat him? Apparently Biden isn’t the only one who’s gone and lost his damn mind over the last four years.

Donald Trump is not the worst president in American history. He’s just not. That presumptuous notion is just categorically and empirically untrue and I don’t give a fuck how unpopular it makes me to say so out loud. What Donald Trump is is the most American president in American history. Think about it, he’s the perfect fiendishly decrepit mascot for an empire in free fall. A fat, greedy, pussy-grabbing, Big Mac gobbling, corporate welfare cashing, old shyster on his last grift. A flatulent, race-baiting, social media trolling, double-dealing, megalomaniac who thinks he’s never looked sexier sprayed Dorito orange and loudly shitting himself on live television. Donald Trump is America. He’s Uncle Sam without the airbrushing, and that is precisely why the most evil people in this country, from Barack Obama to Dick Cheney, despise the motherfucker as much as we do, if not more so, because he is them. He’s them without the charming mask of imperial sanity to hide behind. He’s Wilson in a Klan hood. He’s Truman giggling like a schoolgirl over Nagasaki. He’s Bill without the saxophone and Obama without the charming diction. Donald Trump is America’s mirror, look upon ye mighty and despair.

The most tragically hilarious thing about the American left’s imperial anti-Trump hysteria is that it’s the byproduct of the very lesser evil mental illness that the Donald thrives on. Responsible American propagandists have been shoving the sick delusion down our throats for generations that the patriotic thing to do is not just to vote but vote for one of two pre-approved, corporate-sponsored, oligarchs in our two-party duopoly. They don’t even try to deny the fact that both choices are downright evil anymore. Of course they are! Democracy, they tell us condescendingly, is picking the least destructive psychopath, and that is precisely what America did in 2016.

When the Rust Belt was given the option between a clearly incompetent psychopath who pissed off all the right people for all the wrong reasons, and a smashingly successful psychopath who spent the last two decades complicit in shipping their jobs to Mexico and their children to Iraq, these good old boys did exactly what they were instructed to do. They picked a man too goddamn stupid to be as evil as another fucking Clinton.

And here we are now in 2020, and even the anarchists are telling us to suck it up and save America from despair by giving it a slightly more respectable psychopath to steer it around the icebergs.

To this my only response is to ask why I should do anything to keep this juggernaut from sinking? You want me to pick a lesser evil? Well, which one even is the lesser evil here? I honestly can’t even fucking tell anymore. I vote for whichever candidate on the ballot opposes the empire the lesser evils turned this country into, and that ain’t Donald Trump or Joe Biden, so y’all can just kiss my irresponsible anarchist ass goodnight. Peg me a dreamer, dearest motherfuckers, but I’d rather be a bad American with a clean conscience than a morally feckless dupe any day of the week. Enjoy your scumbag pageant. I’m opting out.

Source: Exile in Happy Valley

  1. Rowdy-Yates says

    Fascinating article. Like to add my own.
    Lincoln – his relationship with Karl Marx-and his relationship with Horace Greeley to destroying the Jeffersonian form of gov and the power of the States. Centralized government. Marxism became part of DC’s heritage
    Roosevelt -Made it illegal for Americans to own gold in 1933 which made the 1929 crash that much worse
    Clinton-signed in NAFTA allowing the whole scale outsourcing of jobs and companies which started the process to gut the middle class
    Obama- Made it legal for the media to use propaganda which has led to our msm openly and blatantly lying about the shutdown.

  2. Jihadi Colin says

    My friend “Exile In Happy Valley” is perfectly right. Trump is Amerikastan brought to life. It’s what Amerikastanis see when they look in a mirror: an amoral, corrupt, ignorant boor with the appeal of a decomposing sack of potatoes. That’s why they hate him so.

    1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

      Where is Trump growing opium poppies for the CIA?

  3. plamenpetkov says

    thumbs up.

  4. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

    The author must not have heard about Lincoln, Trump’s mentor.

    1. plamenpetkov says

      or Roy Cohn.

      1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

        Are you aware that Roy Cohn died on August 2, 1986?

  5. cechas vodobenikov says

    the disgraced linguist Chomsky has become an apologist for the imperialist dimocrats—trump may only be slightly less barbaric and demented than Biden…nothing changes w amerikans: they treated FDR like a traitor, except immigrants….Kennedy, Nixon (their most progressive president) and now trump. amerikans r oblivious to history

  6. stevek9 says

    What makes you think that dismantling the empire is not a good thing for Americans (except those in the MIIC)?

    1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

      It is routinely called public opinion, but it is a anencephalic derelict.

  7. ke4ram says

    I’m no Trump Supporter, nor Biden (Harris), nor do I vote but I’ll bet this author hates everything,,, period. Yes, America is now a violent empire but so was all past empires, Britain, Rome, etc. That’s no excuse but it, the US, is getting what all empires get,,, it’s falling apart at the seams. And guess what? Another violent empire or two to bitch about is just around the corner.

    Plus you can always tell leftist drivel,,, racist,,, white supremacist et all as if every person in the nation is evil incarnate,,, except those burning down the cities,,, of course. Like when the US and all Whites disappears then all will be homey peaceful, just like in Asia and Africa where no violence has ever existed.

    Anyways the worse President of the US and the one that set the nation on the violent course was Lincoln. Of course that won’t fly because Lincoln was fighting against slavery and White Supremacy. Right….

    1. plamenpetkov says

      you are conviviality forgetting, there was never a real Left in USA. What you call left arent really left. THE Left you shit on is a strawman.
      and YES, there is certainly tons of racism in USA, and people DO have the right to burn down the cities. Thats the ONLY way they can protests against the vil system that has been fucking them over for decades. BUt you bitch about it, another red herring/strawman argument. YOu want people to be ncie and happy, and to not raise a finger? Exactly because there is NOt real Left in USA to listen to the very people, that is why the cities are burning, HOW Are people to chnage the system, by singing or voting?

      Start thinking. If you can.

      1. Jihadi Colin says

        Amerikastani “left” = far right Big Business capitalism with a pink hat and wrapped in a rainbow flag.

    2. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

      He used to do cereal commercials until he found one he liked.
      Lincoln never supported the abolition of slavery.
      If he had, he would have have issued the Emancipation Proclamation before he started the war instead of just before it was won.

      1. Jihadi Colin says

        And he would not have excluded slave Union States.

        1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

          As he didn’t, but he didn’t attack them either. Eliminating slavery was not his cause. Getting the Confederate states back to paying tariffs was.

          1. Jihadi Colin says

            I know that. Lincoln said as much.

            1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says


            2. Jihadi Colin says

              In August 1862, Lincoln stated: “If I could save the union without freeing any slaves I would do it; and if I could save it by freeing all the slaves I would do it; and if I could save it by freeing some and leaving others alone I would also do that.”


              I would have imagined that you would know already since I, a non American, do.

            3. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

              Americans have been in long denial about the motives of Lincoln since they moved into his deification.

    3. Raptar Driver says

      When I tell people that Lincoln was the greatest mass murder in American history they all look at me like I just swore at god.

      1. disqus_3BrONUAJno says

        Have you ever heard of Dr. Thomas DiLorenzo?
        If not, you should look him up.
        His books are the definitive record of Lincoln’s treasons.
        The public schools must not be teaching the history that the “civil war” killed more Americans than any other war we ever engaged in.

        1. Raptar Driver says

          I have heard of him and read parts of his books.

      2. plamenpetkov says

        You should never try to change people’s BS, meaning Belief System. Jesus is a prime example of that.

        1. Raptar Driver says

          You can’t change people you can only tell them the truth. Not sure what you mean about Jesus?

Leave A Reply

Your email address will not be published.